Almost 30: Unplugged.

There are 7 months left of being 29. How, I have no idea. Not a bad time to check in, right?

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I’ve been having a multitude of epiphanies over the past few weeks. We all know that your twenties are a time to question everything, to ponder, to reflect. As I near 30, there are certain things, certain limitations I want to let go of, in order to continuously progress.

Fear is probably the biggest thing I want to let go of. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of the unknown. In reality, we have all been dealing with all of these things forever. I think about things I’ve accomplished so far in life, and shit wasn’t easy. There was a lot of doubt and uncertainty, but that’s also part of life. I read this quote the other day, that seemed very fitting in for the place I’m in currently. It reads:

Where are you stuck?Where are you playing it too safe?Where have things become boring in your life?Where  have you stopped growing?

I had to sit with that one. Not just sit, sleep on it, mull over it, have some tea, fellowship with friends, alladat.

I realize that my biggest obstacle, is really myself. In terms of getting to the place I want to spiritually, mentally, emotionally. I literally woke up one day and decided to stop. Stop making the same mistakes over and over again. Put myself out there, take the plunge, take a risk. Give myself tough love, like ‘mora, lowkey you been f*ckin up, let’s get it together forreal. You got this. ‘ You know what? It feels like a huge weight off my chest. The more I do it, just keep it real with myself, with my people, the better I feel. PRAISE.

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When it comes to dating, I think often times, people don’t hold themselves accountable. Accountable for how they themselves contribute to their own heartache. Valuing people who don’t value you, being careless/reckless with your body, your emotions. Continuing to gripe about the past, staying in an unhappy, unsatisfying place. What we fail to realize, is that you have to do something different to obtain different results, even if it’s uncomfortable. It’s SUPPOSED to be uncomfortable. Who told you it was supposed to be pleasant? Nope.

Ya’ll need to keep it real with yourself about when you f*cked up. When you entertained bullshit, when you weren’t honest, when you lied to yourself or your partner, when you put yourself in unhealthy/unstable situations. Be honest. Tell yourself the truth and then don’t do that shit again, got it?

Value yourself more, your space more, your heart more. Create clear boundaries and expectation as to what it is that you want from jump. Again, 30 is coming for a lot of us. The hope is that we have spent our twenties learning about ourselves, and not bringing old baggage to a new decade of life. Nobody has time for it, and to be honest nobody cares more than you should. You owe it to yourself to live the most fulfilling, happy life. Nobody can do that for you, not your friends, your family, or your boo. It’s all on you. Quit making excuses and do the work. You’ll be better, happier, and experience real love in its truest form because you stop being scared of all the things that could go wrong. A thought: everything has the potential to go right. Today, tomorrow, the next six months, the next few years. If you believe in yourself, and the process, it will all work out.

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         Go forth, and be brave. Your heart and happiness depends on it. 

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