During a particularly hard day of work, I had an epiphany ladies and gentlemen. I’m sure you’re wondering what happened with my ‘situation.’ I’ll get to that. But anyways, it was raining. I had done a handful of home visits, all of which were difficult. I work with the mentally ill when I’m not giving you all amazing advice on love and relationships. I dragged my tired body home, and I thought to myself, ‘ I’m better than this.’ What do I mean? I mean all of us work really hard for the most part. We 20-something’s slave away at jobs we hate, because we’re supposed to do that. We’re supposed to work our way up like our parents did. We’re supposed to struggle and find ourselves, and grow. The problem is we don’t really wanna go through this difficult time alone. Who does? In my opinion, being 24 is nothing like I thought it would be. It’s hard, and I still don’t really know what the fuck I’m doing. What I’m saying is it really makes things easier when you have someone who is also going through similar hardships.
Cut to my current situation. I know who I am. I know what kind of person I am. I know I deserve someone who loves me, because I know that I have a lot of love to give. I know that I am wasting time thinking and missing someone who does not do the same for me. So,I have decide to become a serial dater.
There are a few reasons why I think this will be something new and exciting for me. One, more options for the remainder of cuddle season. I’m not talking about multiple hookup partners. It’s 2012, herpes is real, and ain’t nobody got time for unwanted pregnancies. I’m saying in option A is a fail, you have options B and C in case you want to go out one night, or want to stay in an cuddle. Who says winter has to be lonely? It’s what you make it! Two, if you’re not necessarily ready for something serious yet, it’s an opportunity to learn what you like, what you don’t like. It’s like buying jeans. When have you ever tried a pair of jeans and then gone home right after? Never! You try at least three pairs, because they all fit differently. But only one is the perfect fit. Three, it’s easy to get bored and succumb to just Netflix and takeout during the winter months. Why not keep things interesting?
I know, its a little extreme, right? It’s completely out of character of me. I’m such a one track mind when it comes to the opposite sex. However, that hasn’t been working out very well. So last Friday, I double booked.Don’t judge me! I made plans with a guy I had met the night before, for a drink, and got an unexpected text from an old flame. So I did the unusual: I hung out with them both.
Meeting #1: it was a meetup for Blacks in Technology. Not really my style,but hey, I’m open to new things. Not gonna lie,I was exhausted/ grouchy from work, so I was fighting both boredom and sleep during the meeting. This new guy is definitely not my type at all. He’s not tall, he’s older, more serious. I’m more attracted to his mind than anything.But as I said, he’s different, intriguing, gentlemanly. Why the hell not, right? To be continued…
Meeting #2: Later in the night, I met with my old flame. Backstory: went on a few dates, he disappeared. The end.
Except that I ran into him twice in the past six months,and thought it might mean something. Anyway, we met at Starbucks. He bought me a hot chocolate,which was a win because it was brick outside. We talked a lot. We talked about what happened two years ago when we met, we talked about our lives currently. Let’s just say I was ready to tell him to fuck off, until he really opened up about his romantic woes. The evening left me both confused, and considering what it would mean if we ended up picking up where we left off.
I have to say,the whole evening was really fun, and unexpected, and strangely….liberating. I felt in control, and free. I feel like if this is the other side of single, I could handle it. So we’re going to try a little experiment this new year. We’re going to try serial dating. See what happens, see what new information I glean, by completely stepping out of my comfort zone.
I encourage young singles like myself, to try it out. Let’s compare notes. Until then, Happy New Year lovers and friends! See you in 2013.
One thought on “Serial Dating: The Future”
As a serial dater extraordinaire (or perhaps a reformed one), I think serial dating can be a lot of fun. Hell, I should have written a blog on it. However, I caution you about the other side of serial dating: “burn out.” There comes a point when you keep going out with people and having fun, but no one sticks and no one stands out, and eventually you get pretty jaded. So yes, do go on dates with people that are outside your comfort zone, but be selective enough that you still keep your standards. Also make sure you still have enough time for yourself and your friends with all the dates you’ll be going on.